Top Ten 34 DialANerd repair computer network virus Columbia

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8/22/1999 Return
Top Ten
Ways to Piss Off Captain Kirk

10.

Remind him that "the other guy" had all the special hand gestures and cool phrases.  ("Live long and prosper")

9.

Wear pointy ears to a bar and show him what a "chick-magnet" they can be.

8.

Razz him about Scotty not beaming down his clothes.  Says Kirk, "It NEVER HAPPENED!  It was a joke!"

7.

After the Clinton-intern fiasco, no female yeomen are allowed on the bridge without a chaperone.

6.

Replace his hairpiece with a prop from the Tribbles episode.

5.

Play just about any of the reruns of T. J. Hooker.

4.

Shake a tambourine.  If you don't know what we're talking about, thank your lucky stars! 

3.

Car mechanic?  Grocery bagger?  Tell him you're "givin it all ya got".  He loves that.

2.

Accuse him of under-acting.  "You... klingonbastard-you...killed my son!"

1.

The most pissed off we've ever seen Captain Kirk is when Pete tried to jumper the clock settings on Kirk's tricorder.

More information in WJFK 1300 AM is found here: WJFK 1300 AM

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